


A Snek walks into a Tavern

by smolpandabean



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Caduceus isn't much better, F/F, First Kiss, Light Angst, M/M, MC is a Dumb Gay(TM), Original Character-centric, Self-Hatred, shitty chapter titles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 12:45:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17808209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolpandabean/pseuds/smolpandabean
Summary: Listen, listen guys. I’m a Dumb Pansexual™ for everything that is Taliesin Axelrod Jaffe and OCs are kind of a ‘no-no’ when it comes to most fanfiction. I’ll let you in on a secret…I do what I what.Anyway here is my Black Mamba based, Yuan-ti pureblood Fighter, Sketh and how he finds out how much of a Dumb Gay™ he is and Caduceus is in the same boat. Plenty of backstory because that's what I do and needed to write some gay shit that I was lacking. Also I’m not caught up of the show so there aren’t any spoilers past Episode 35.





	1. And Has a Long Reflection of the Past because Reasons

**Author's Note:**

> I can't this shit short, can I? Also I'm two days late for Valentine's Day so here.

After following Caleb and Beau around so the wizard could look for books and the monk could gander at the various women and silently compare them to the mountain of a lady that was Yasha, who had returned to them for a time again. The whole time, Sketh was careful to not speak too much or open his mouth too wide, the black insides of his mouth disturbed and often horrified less perceptive folk as if the odd shape of his lips and the scales on his neck and face didn’t give his serpent bloodline away.

”I hope Fjord was able to keep Jester and Nott out of trouble, it was funny the last two times they painted dicks onto the Dawn Father.” Beau snorted at the memory, Caleb already absorbed into his new reading material remained silent as the trio walked back to the Inn they had taken lodgings in. Sketh, being left in his thoughts again, couldn’t help but think back to when the Mighty Nein spent their first night back in the Empire and how chatty and open Caduceus had been. Happy to be away from the ocean and all the brushes with death the firbolg faced there, the light catching his eyes as he smiled.

Sketh had never met or seen a firbolg in his life until they met Mila and later Caduceus, the Cleric offering comfort and aid in their time of loss for Mollymauk, the flamboyant Tiefling’s passing affected everyone. The fighter often sought the towering man for advice, usually getting a cup of tea and more than he bargained for, this pattern of closeness along with the number of times the two had shared a room to save money, piqued Jester’s interest.

_”Do you like Caduceus? Because I think you guys would be very cute together.” Jester smiled as Sketh stammered, caught in the act of staring at their tall pink friend. “That-that-that’s very kind of you, Jester but… Clay wouldn’t settle for someone like me. I’ll grab more firewood.”_

The little cleric never brought it up again but still poked and nudged the man’s side when Sketh would stare doe-eyed at Caduceus, giggling to herself when her serpentine friend would get caught by someone and would make up some excuse or ask a mindless question to get Caduceus off topic. It worked… most of the time, other times the Mighty Nein would bear down questions upon Sketh until he walked away or someone, usually Fjord or Caduceus, would tell them to stop.

”You’ll have to tell him eventually, Sketh. It’ll weigh down on you if you don’t.” Yasha had told him once after they took watch together, the fighter spilling his secrets to the tall woman. Figuring out that Caduceus was likely listening to them, Sketh was quick to cover up his emotions until he knew he was truly alone. Those times came seldom and short-lived as the group traveled the sea, privacy wasn’t much of an option, Sketh and Fjord knew that from experience.

Things were better now that they were back in the Empire, despite the whole war going on. There were always jobs to do, monsters to fight, and gold to be picked by their resident goblin, not only that, but Sketh could find time away from the group to sort himself, at least the physical side of his infatuation... The knight never talked about it and didn’t want to, he would surely die of embarrassment if anyone found out, especially Caduceus. That and the poetry, Sketh never claimed to be a romantic or be a waxing poet, but the time he shows anyone his work will be the day The Matron of Ravens takes him away.


	2. The Forgets to Blink while Staring at Ya Boi

The tavern was normally overrun with people, but with the war, it only had the men and women who couldn’t serve. The elderly, the lame, the sick, the Mighty Nein stuck out like they always did. Sketh spotted Fjord with Jester, Nott, and Yasha, some color in his green skin as the detectives snickered. Beau snuck her way to the barbarian’s side, a cheeky smile on her face as she pulled a painted rose from her coat, presenting it to Yasha. Caleb only looked up to get to their table while Sketh looked around for their towering friend, dark eyes catching the vibrant pink waves at the bar.

The Firbolg spoke quietly to the barman, the gentle smile always on his lips. The low lighting in the bar reflected off the silken shirt, the armor upstairs, away for the night. He trimmed a bit, Sketh noticed, at sea, there are little to no luxuries available unless supplies before embarking. They only supplied for the voyage and the voyage only, no real luxuries until they reached other shores. Everyone got a bit scruffy, expect for Sketh and Nott, their heritage preventing such.

”Cads, let me help you.” The taller man jumped at his approach, his smiled only widening when it was just Sketh at his side, grabbing the rest of the party’s drinks. “Thank you, very kind of you, Mr. Sketh.” The knight bit back a correction, as he was not worthy of even that with the things he’d done. Caduceus deserved someone of better standing than him, Sketh didn’t have anyone to point out but anyone better than him, no matter how much Jester said that the Firbolg would accept his affections.

~~

With the evening being filled with the majority of the party getting drunk off their asses, the Clerics, Yasha, and Sketh were left in charge of getting everyone to bed. Most of the time, Caleb and Sketh shared a room, the girls all shared one, and Fjord and Caduceus had one. Fjord, the lightweight, passed out in front of Wizard’s room and Yasha made the decision to dump him off on Sketh’s bed and not his own, forcing Sketh to room with the one person he’s avoided being alone with.

”Are you trying to get me to freak out and consider flinging myself from the balcony! I swear if this is Jester’s idea, I’ll lock her and Fjord together until that green bean cracks.” Yasha chuckled, supporting her girl with one arm and holding a passed out Nott in the other. Caduceus was already in his room, probably expecting a wasted Fjord and not a mildly sober half-snake whose very existence was a stain in the eyes of his goddess. If he could sweat, Sketh would be drenched, if he could cry, there would most likely be tears in his eyes.

Sketh paced a bit outside the dreaded room Caduceus was, the man was likely reading or wandering in his mind. The rest of the party was sleeping, the tavern below gone quiet as the late evening drew near. The fighter still avoided going into the room, using the public basin to scrub his armor and pick at the peeling skin from his scales. Of all the nights to begin shedding, it had to be this one. With a defeated sign, Sketh went back to the door and steeled his nerves, taking the knob and entering to what is a battlefield in his eyes.


	3. Ya Boi Ponders His Calling/Crush when Interrupted by a Snek

Caduceus often thought back to when he joined the Mighty Nein, and how far they’ve all come since then. Sketh gave him a bad aura at first, but through his actions and loyalty in protecting the group. The Firbolg realized that the aura wasn’t the knight himself, but his bloodline that had his goddess in a stir. Was his calling to guide their fighter to the light, or something more malicious? He couldn’t tell nor was he receiving any answers from the Wildmother, even as they returned to the Empire.

Sketh proved himself a well-trained navigator, though hid how he learned and what ships he sailed upon ‘till the truth was forced into the light. The name _’Black Mouth’_ struck a bell with few, all that Caduceus knew was that Sketh had left that life behind to make up for what he did. The Cleric could appreciate that much, listening to the scaled man talk about navigation or the islands he’d explored for hours. It kept his mind off the ever-still ocean, the unchanging scenery driving him to talk to fish and whatever birds flew over them.

The man often entered his mind during meditation, the closed smile he often threw about, sometimes with a quirk of an eyebrow or a glint in his eyes that had strangers spilling their secrets to him. The predatorial glare he’d seen in battle, protecting those he cared for while hunting anything that stood in his way. Caduceus had many times seen this glare in action, the black mist that escaped his lips when casting the one spell of few that was weaved into his blood. It brought something that he’s never experienced living with his family then in solitude, a coiling burn that rushed his heart when catching eyes with Sketh in battle. 

He didn’t know how to go about it and asked Jester, his fellow cleric, about the feeling. She gave him a mischievous grin and told him to try and act on the feelings, unfortunately he didn’t know how to do that either and kindly rejected the tiefling’s offer on suggestions. Figuring that they would contain some form a nudity or an inappropriate joke that would fly of his head until Sketh explained it.

The snow falling outside the window brought a gentle smile to his face, sound of the door creaking open behind him caught the firbolg off-guard. Readying himself to assist Fjord to bed when Sketh’s nervous face peaked around the door, his armor tucked under his arm and hair down from the slick back look. He didn’t speak at all while setting his armor at the end of the bed and sat to remove his shoes, pausing after several minutes of silence.

”Fjord got put in my bed, so… so I’m stealing his for the night.” His voice was a shy rumble, the heat that was gathering in the pit of Caduceus’s stomach spread to his chest and face. “That’s… That’s nice, I was hoping to speak with you, actually. Alone.” The cleric didn’t miss Sketh flinching at his words, but kept his smile gentle and open as Sketh moved to face him, taking the brief moment to look over the fighter as a whole.

Sketh was a being that he was suppose to hate, but the feeling he holds wasn’t malice. The soft, black locks that hung loose over sharp features with eyes that were ordinary to the average man, but easy to get lost in for Caduceus. The way the man fretted and fussed over the scales that, if anything, enhanced his allure. His voice was something to listen closely to, otherwise you would miss the sweet syllables that dripped pieces of his heart with them. As cardinal as it was, the rest of the fighter was something the cleric marveled at in his own time, defined muscles from his years at sea and the training he still practiced when he found the time. 

”This is, uh, difficult for me to talk about as I… I don’t know much about this topic. If I’m being completely honest with you.” The chuckle he let out seemed to relax the warrior in front of him, a small grin crawling its way onto Sketh’s face. “Well, maybe you can describe it or act on it. It might make it easier for you.” It fell silent as the words fell, Caduceus racking his brain ways to convey how he feels about the man in front of him, thankful that the fur on his face cover the furious blush that was likely consuming his face by now. He didn’t know what to do, he’d seen what couples did in the streets and how his parents show affection but this was something different, uncharted territory.

”I, uh…” Without overthinking it, Caduceus grabbed Sketh hands in his own, his gloves removed so the scales on the backs of his hands shined in the candle light. He ran his thumbs over the textured skin, mind willingly wandering from the awkward tension that sat between the two. They sat in silence for a time until the two looked up to see how close they had gotten, mere inches from each other. Sketh could see his reflection in the pink hues of the cleric’s eyes, while the said healer discovered a slight ring of gold in the bottomless sea of brown.

”I think this…” Sketh began trailing off as they leaned closer, the space between them dwindling. “What? What do you think?” Caduceus murmured, entranced by the fighter’s scent of sweet wine and herbs. The sweet smile he adored appeared on Sketh’s face, the faint hint of the black gums peeking out from his lips.

”Nothing. Nothing at all.” A hand cupped his jaw as they moved slowly, no rush felt, no hurry to finish. Caduceus’s now free hand traveled up to grip at the loose shirt, fingers grazing the skin beneath and feeling the muscle flex and twitch under his touch. Their hearts beating in their ears as Sketh gently pushed the man down onto the bed, eyes growing sharp with hunger. Ready to devour the prey beneath him.


End file.
